Miscoupling

Colors-

myraid colors

paint my slumber.

no, not the dreams…

i never reach there.

my slumber is thick,

it engulfs me

all day-

and at night,

color blind

i stumble on some carcass,

dreams that were out there

in open

far too long-

dreams that i dare not let

into my eyes, or heart, or mind.

the grind

was water tight,

rigid,

conforming.

no space to see

beyond the stiff walls,

no whiff of a horizon,

no sky overhead,

no fluff of a cloud.

everything around

was well formed,

solid,

impenetrable,

everything around

confounding

in one shapeless

presence

the present.

i was too scared

to dare

inch out

it spread far and wide

how could i hide

in such magnificiance of colors!

i let the shades envelop me.

myraid shades

when mixed

created a thick dark rivulet,

and i sucked in the darkness,

sleep walking

from day to day-

skipping the nights

where i let dreams rot,

not

for lack of faith or belief,

it was a relief

to let the miscarriage

prevent the murder

of a child of miscoupling.